It is said that first impression is usually the last impression. I’m sure many of us will agree to this. But is it really so? And is it right for us to take first impressions that seriously? Have you ever thought that while doing so what we actually do is make use of stereotypes that have been stuffed into our brains by the media and environment alike, which are difficult to shake off even if one wants to.
For example, whenever we see a person wearing specs with an unkempt hairdo the first signal that our brain sends us is “Beware, nerd ahead.” A smartly dressed girl complying with the latest fashion is bound to be hopeless at studies. A kid who travels everywhere in a car is a spoilt sport; poor people aren’t cultured and polished enough; assertive people are aggressive. A good sportsman is never good at anything but sports; a girl with cropped hair wearing sneakers is a tomboy; people who converse in English are show-offs; and teens use mobiles as a status symbol.
That’s what a person’s first impression tells us. But do people really turn out to be that way. Barely ever, in fact, never is more suited to this scenario and I say so from personal experience.
In fact it is just a self imposed barrier that we have put on ourselves to distinguish between the haves and the have nots, the us and them, the people on our side and the rest of the people. If it really seems so difficult for you to believe, let’s take an example.
It’s the first day at college, girls from different schools and backgrounds gather together. Right next to a rich girl wearing branded shoes and carrying a branded bag comes and sits a girl huffing and puffing who has just gotten off from the public bus. It’s the first day and both of them are alone here with no friends from previous schools. Both of them are dying to make new friends. But they don’t speak a word to each other. Any idea why? Simply because the rich girl has this notion in her mind that the other girl isn’t her type. She won’t understand what she says; she probably doesn’t listen to English songs, she has no access to teen mags, etc. On the other hand, the second girl might think the first one seems too arrogant and self centred to be nice enough to become friends with. Plus the rich one’s here just for the heck of it, while I really do want to study.
And so both of them without ever so much as saying a word, disregard each other due to preconceived notions. What a waste! If only one of them had dared to open up, to break away from old notions, they might have found in each other great friends, just the ones they wanted. But that first impression theory never let that happen.
Sound’s familiar. That’s because we indulge in it frequently and waste so many of beautiful opportunities to make friends that life bestows upon us. What we fail to realize is that each one of us is very special, very unique, that we can’t be labelled. Each one of us is different. Just like no two days are alike, no two people think or act in the same way.
Let’s just be a bit more open to others a bit different from us around here and be the first ones to break the ice.
No comments:
Post a Comment